The problem with the manic pixie dreamgirl trend in media is that it trains men to assume every girl they pass with a pretty dress, unusual hair, and sparkly eye-liner is some kind of deep and quirky and paradoxical nymph, which is complete erasure of girls like me, who are absolute gremlins.
There’s a certain point in conversations with guys when you can tell that’s what he’s thinking. He fell for the sparkly nails and the off-the-shoulder top and he’s expecting you to tell him how your dream is to bike across France with just the clothes on your back. How you like art museums because they feel like the beautiful preservation of long-dead artists’ souls. How you believe humans evolved sight in order to appreciate the infinitely unreachable cascade of stars above.
And at that point you’ve already lost. There’s no graceful way to clarify that you’re actually just a gremlin in a sundress, which you got for $14.99 on the clearance rack at Old Navy while trying to buy socks. That you actually don’t know anything about philosophy or whimsy or world-travel you get anxious taking the subway anywhere new. That you actually really have to go because you already have plans for the evening of lying in a blanket-burrito in bed watching a 49 minute Youtube video review of an anime you’ve never heard of.
The manic pixie dreamgirl trope is socially-anxious-dumbass erasure and i wont stand for it
Prompt-based fandom events are when you really learn everyone’s colors like you’ll find the people who take the prompt “death” and come up with some smarmy ship-art of character A and character B walking over dead leaves while wearing scarves and drinking hot cider and then you’ll find the people who take the prompt “sunshine” and write how a bright glint of sunshine reflected off the barrel of a gun is the absolute last thing character A sees before taking a bullet to the chest
you can lead a content creator to water but you sure as fuck can’t make him drink
It’s Christmas and as a festive Christmas activity my family and I are calculating the logistics of Spiders Georg
“average person eats 3 spiders a year" factoid actualy just statistical error.
“3 spiders per year” mentioned in the original Spiders Georg post, according to Google there are ~7.6 billion people in the world (limiting my post to 2 sigfigs under operations of multiplication and division, like any self respecting mathematician would use in their experimental calculations. I’m not limiting myself to one sigfig based on the “3″ because that is of course the Holy Word of God, the original shitpost, and should be taken as literal).
Spiders Georg is eating ~720 spiders per second.
Now, the weight of the average spider wasn’t easy to find, but I’ll go with a conservative estimate and say the small spiders are roughly on par with the size of a worker ant, and so let’s call the average spider roughly 3 mg (As a self-respecting scientist, I’ve been reduced to 1 sigfig by this crude approximation).
Spiders Georg is eating ~5pounds of spiders per second.
Or, per minute:
~300 pounds
Or, for fun, per day:
~400,000 pounds
Which is the weight of 30 African elephants per day.
Spiders Georg is the real hero out there saving us from spider consumption, yet this raises more questions than it answers. Who is transporting these spiders to him? Does he eat spiders full-time, or does he fit it into an 8 hour work day, tripling these numbers? Does he have a team helping him or does he bear the weight of the world on his own, like a modern-day spidery Atlas?
Thanks for coming to my Ted Talk.
Someone had to calculate this.
It was important.
Someone had to!!!!!
…….
….
“average Spiders Georg eats 10,000 spiders each day" factoid actualy just statistical error. average Spiders Georg eats 0 spiders per day. The Mathematically True Spiders Georg, who compensates for mathematical inaccuracies & eats over 60,000,000 spiders each day, is an outlier adn should not have been counted
all memeing aside this is starting to sink in because holy fuck im gonna teach an actual college lecture. like im gonna walk in and students are gonna be seated and im gonna pull up a powerpoint (different powerpoint) and hand out notes like “this is what shit is”
none of which exists yet. and none of which is technically part of the class either. the prof is literally just trusting me to have the wherewithal to kick the doors in and teach shit well and correctly
not to be snooty hopefully because i mean this in the most holy shit manner just–these students have credentials. hardcore credentials.
credentials.
not like im bullshitting to a bunch of ninth graders im gonna have to teach stuff to people who know shit. like i gotta know shit 110% if im gonna teach to people who already know shit.and at least half the people im lecturing are older than me too. like, they are my peers. you’d think the game is just trying to keep up with your classmates and not. being their prof. for a day.
actually wait no you know what makes it worse? (better??) (worse???) is you know what statistic most sticks in my mind from when I was doing college applications??? its this one
and the last line cracks me up “didnt have to share with Princeton” like yeah fuck Princeton and
this is getting off topic my point is holy shit because now some tiny percent of that “#1 ranked university in teaching” is me and just
Yoooo so I got offered a position as a TA in my stats class next term it’s taught based on my performance and whatever. And I like that sort of work so I’ll probably accept it, except this class is offered to undergrad, grad, and PhD students, and even the undergrads are typically juniors at least.
Like Real Actual Adults are going to walk in with questions about problem sets while I, a mere Smol Child, probably sitting on a booster seat, get to explain stuff to them. I’m expecting at least several instances of *FMA secondary character voice* “Wait so YOU’RE the TA? I’m so sorry I had no idea you’d be so little.”
Gotta bring a sign along like “CAUTION: TA is young and small. Please do not offer her any alcoholic beverages or step on her thank you.”
Becca understands my struggle and has illustrated my point
it begins
Wait hang on this is even funnier now that, for one of the other things I’m (also!!) TA-ing, I’m head TA.
And for that class I’m in charge of 3 lectures during the term.
Like I step in for the prof. He doesn’t show up its just me.
-drags my booster seat up to the podium- “welcome to the Ivy League maggots” -whips out my sparkly hot pink notebook, slams down my matching glitter gel pen- “we don’t FUCK AROUND in my class got it?”
Yo so my little brother snapchatted me this morning. He’s in precalc right now and he has the same teacher I had 3 years back.
Like, I’d almost forgotten but I’d discovered some convenient property for figuring out the intersection of weird-ass graphs. Something much easier than the way it was being textbook-taught. I showed my teacher and she was like “damn ur right” and showed the class how to do it that way.
Apparently she teaches her class my method now?? Like the course has been modified and kids learn to do it the “Chrissy Long Theorem” way instead of the way it’d been taught all the years before. My legacy lives on in some nerd-ass math. What a thing
My poor lil bro though. Now he’s gotta try to come up with some theorem to stack up. Pray for him he hates math.
It’s been 3 years, so I’m a liiiittle fuzzy, but I think I remember how it went down. Never mind I actually remember it perfectly lol
So if you’re graphing a function which is a quotient of polynomials (like a “cubed” function divided by a “squared” function, like you can see in the snap) there are usually asymptotes associated with the graph. Can be lines, can be parabolas. You find it by performing long division on the two polynomials–it’ll be their quotient. From the snap, it looks like they’re graphing 2x^3/(x^2-x-6), and the found asymptote is 2x+2.
The follow-up question that needs to be answered is “Does the graph ever intersect the asymptote at any point?” Sometimes it does, and you need to be able to represent it on the graph. The old textbook way involved taking your solved-for asymptote (the 2x+2 here) and setting it equal to the graphed equation ( 2x^3/(x^2-x-6)), solving out for x, and seeing if it equals a value. This probably requires some quadratic formula tinkering in most scenarios.
I noticed something though. You could answer the “does it cross?” question far, far more simply by looking at the remainder from the original long division. See that “14x+12″ which is left over on the board? If that can be set equal to 0 and solved out for x, then a) yes it crosses, and b) it crosses at the value of your solved-for x. You just need to take that x and plug it into your line to find y.
So in short, instead of kids have to solve 2x+2 = 2x^3/(x^2-x-6) for x, I realized you only have to solve 14x+12 = 0. In which x= -12/14, which simplifies to -6/7. And then the y comes from plugging in that x to the solved-for line y=2x+2.
Glancing at it now, I also know what the proof is for this, and why it works infallibly:
My method hones in on the x-value which will make the remainder 0. If the remainder is zero, that means the division between the numerator and denominator polynomial is exactly equal to the value of the asymptote line for this x. It’s almost as simple as saying “Because 6/3 = 2 with no remainder, that means 6/3 REALLY DOES equal 2. As opposed to, for example, 7/3 = 2 R1, where 7/3 doesn’t really equal 2.)
So by virtue of these two Y VALUES being exactly equal to each other at a specified X VALUE, it follows that my method has identified a coordinate (X, Y) which denotes a point of intersection between the graphed function and its asymptote.
FMA03 Scar is just so bishie. He looks like he’s in danger of starting a boy band any second. He’s so delicate. So streamline and alluring. He was an extra in a shojo anime who stumbled on set and they were like “shit man we needed someone to play the vengeful murderer youre hired”
And Brotherhood Scar is just so goddamn shredded. 80% jawline. 15% cheek bones. 5% man pain. Dude coulda bench-pressed Sloth out of the fucking Briggs fortress if he’d just been around for it. Testosterone is ashamed of its masculinity around Brotherhood!Scar. Someone chiseled a block of marble and it started talking and everyone just rolled with it.
How are these two the same character howd this happen I’m just fucking laughing
“My emotions are very complex and sometimes I cry while writing free-verse poetry.”
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