This newest episode of Steven Universe was perhaps the best one in terms of lessons for kids (and adults) so far. BOTH episodes featuring Kevin have been, but this one in a very healing way.
Steven and Connie recognize that Kevin violated their boundaries when they were Stevonnie, and they are understandably upset. The first amazing thing that this episode does is show that people express anger and hurt differently. Just because Connie wasn’t as passionately vocal about her upset, doesn’t mean it didn’t affect her.
Steven and Connie both express things they want from Kevin to help them feel better after what he did to them, things they felt they needed to recover from how he violated their boundaries at the dance. They want him to hear what they have to say, they want to make him think, they want him to feel guilt or remorse or shame. They essentially put their health, their recovery, under the control of the person who hurt them in the first place; the one person they should absolutely not under any circumstances trust with that power.
Kevin uses that power to needle them from the moment they’re around him again. And please do notice that Kevin does not care that they are children. Even knowing that they are young, he still treats them badly, tries to get their attention, even flirts with them in a very mocking and uncomfortable way.
And THEN, the wonderful thing, the thing that I am constantly telling abuse survivors, was communicated in a childrens’ cartoon:
You should never, ever place your recovery in your abuser’s hands in any way, shape, or form. It is not safe to trust them with that power, they will only use it to hurt you further.
Setting goals for your recovery that include needing something from your abuser is not safe. Being heard by them, them feeling remorse, them offering an apology, a change in their behavior, admission of their guilt or wrongdoing; NONE of these things are things that you can depend on abusers to give. Even if it feels like it’s needed, even if it feels like you’ll never get over what happpened without these things, it’s not safe, it’s not healthy, and it’s not necessary.
The next extremely important thing this episode showed (in a simplistic way) is that that recovery is possible without getting anything from the offender. Without involving the person who hurt you at all. That’s a beautiful message to put in a kids’ show, and I’m so happy.
The vast majority of abuse survivors struggle with this, it’s extremely difficult for people to come to this realization and to withdraw that last bit of power from the people who hurt them. The idea that kids could learn something like this at a young age is incredibly important to me.
Thank you Crewniverse, and thank you @rebeccasugar so, so much.
We have the character Greg, who works his ass off at a crappy job to provide for his kid. He lives in a van. He has nothing. But he always makes sure Steven has everything he needs. He never begrudges the fact that he had to give up on his dreams to stay in Beach City. He’s never resentful about his lot in life. He’s just a fantastic guy in general.
So an episode comes up where he, after years of being very poor, ends up with a lot of money. A TON of money.
Everything in cartoon history tells me that he’s supposed to go nuts spending all the money or he’ll be scammed or tricked or some crazy event will happen that costs a ton of money, or it will turn out it was all fake, and just somehow, by the end of the episode, he ends up back to being dirt poor and learns some cheap message about humility and money not buying happiness. I spent the whole episode “Mr.Greg” waiting for the rug to be pulled out from under him.
But it wasn’t.
He spends money somewhat frivolously, but it’s all to have a good time with his son, which he does, and he still has the vast majority of the money left at the end. It probably only cost a few thousand out of his 10 million at most.
He doesn’t become obsessed with being wealthy. It doesn’t change him at all. He stays in his van instead of buying a big fancy house because it’s where he feels comfortable. He keeps working the car wash because it’s something to do. When he buys a tablet, he decides it isn’t for him and lets Steven give it to someone who would like it more. He buys a car he always wanted, but he buys it used. It’s not showy or extravagant, it’s just a car that he’d always wanted and can now have.
The only difference now is that, when something happens like someone stiffing him at the car wash, or the gems destroying another diner booth, Greg doesn’t have to worry about it. He can just live his life comfortably and without stressing about money.
It also makes me happy that Greg earned the money through his music. It’s not the way he’d originally envisioned it, perhaps, but he is now an incredibly successful musician.
There was no lesson about not “selling out”. There was no moral about how money won’t fix your problems. There was no joke about a poor man being totally clueless about money or overwhelmed with greed.
It’s just a great, humble, hard-working guy who becomes monetarily successful and remains a great, humble, hard-working guy who just now doesn’t have to worry about money and can afford to treat himself right after years of neglecting himself to make sure that his son was always provided for.
I don’t know, maybe they will still pull it all out from under him yet. Maybe it will still all go away and he’ll be back to being dirt poor. But for now, I’m loving the direction they’ve been taking with this story line. I’m so sick of seeing shows be so afraid to change anything about the status quo of the show that they have to undo all progress anyone makes by the end of every episode. It’s refreshing to see a show where things change.
Greg: The sunshine don’t cost a thing.
The entire fandom: Buy a house! Please, you live in a van, your son needs you, take care of yourself, buy some health insurance, get a physical. Please.
It seems that Peridot has taken over Cartoon Network’s Twitter! (x)
media: here’s a love triangle. the strong female protagonist cannot decide between these two boys: the dark and brooding bad boy, and her sweet domestic friend.
me: sorry i don’t care about love triangles. ill find something else.
media: here’s a love triangle. this military leader is being pursued by her long-time soldier and friend of the same gender and by this alien of a strange new gender who knows nothing of her past. and when she dies her two suitors work together to raise her son.
me: never fucking mind please tell me everything that happened.
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