Tag: toby

Sorry

oreramar:

Toby’s
earliest memory is of a man’s voice. It is booming, echoing through whatever
space Toby is in – indoors, he thinks, full of golden light, though whether it comes
from candles or those old incandescent lightbulbs he can’t recall. Bulbs,
probably; he thinks it must have been the main hall of the church, though it
might have been somewhere else. There are people all around him, and someone
pressed against his side holds his hand. He thinks it’s the sister he barely
remembers. He’s seated on something hard, and his toes can’t reach the ground.

He is
so tiny, and everything else is immense.

The
man’s words are the biggest things of all.

He can’t
remember them precisely. A lot of it made no sense to his young mind, and more
was lost to the dimness of memory besides. It doesn’t matter. Meaning had
nothing on the feel of them, and that was guilt, and shame, and unworthiness,
scintillating among the dust motes in the air, swirling off of the people
around him in a faint haze of not-quite-color.

I should be ashamed too, his tiny
subconscious self had decided, mimicking those around him. He was too young for
logic, but still there had been a question and answer he had hardly been aware
of: Ashamed of what?

Myself.

Keep reading

tau-cast:

So dippycat are you really only watching Toby or is there something your not telling us *cough* youreallydolovehimasasonyouneverhad *cough*

I̐ͥͫ̃̐̑͒ͣ͏̢̘͡ ̧̻̠͍͖̗ͭ͋͋̽ͫH͖͔͕͍͖͈̭ͦ̾͗Aͣ͒̈͗ͣͯ͏͓̟̦̳̯̣͎ͅͅV͚̪͍͑́̚͢E̐̐̚͘҉̥̣̩̥̹̩̕ ̶̨̙͉͖̭ͦH̖̝̤̯̗̻͛̒̽̋̅ͧͮ͑͡Å̀̈́҉̢̻̱̻͇D̯̳ͪ̾͡ ̸̨̥̙͒ͯÉ͇̞̹̪͆̇͗̿͗͜N̨ͭͫͨͮͦͮ̓́ͪ҉̩̺̱̟͓͓̹͇̀O̵̧͙̳̣͉͌̈ͧ̉̍̈́Ų̺̙̰̦̥̆͌̾́ͤ̇ͅG̥̹̳̝͆̽ͨͮͧ̒ͣͪH̵̭̥̘̣͔͔͔̯̋̂ͫ̓͜ ̭̘̳̦̰̲̲͕̻̂̄͑̀̚̕Ŏ̴̜̭̯̰̩̪̗͂͞F̸̱̣̰̳͒ͮ̾̽ͩ̓͋ ̨̢͕̭̭̬͎̏̐́̊͝Y̶̙̱̬̗̰̯ͦ̐̔̃̌̇̔̌̐O̰̙̜̟̘͋Ǚ̘̱̩̄͋ͧ̐ͬ̊̚ ̎ͮͨͭ̾ͬ̓͑ͮ҉̘̪̳̳̀P̢̃̓́̈̆̓҉͚E̶͔̱͓̝͖̣͙͌͋̄Ȏ͉͙͙̗ͣ̄͌̐̓̂̚͡P̴̜̟͎̬͔̥̞̀͑̔͌́L̻̟͈̰̋̍̌ͣ̇E̻͉̦͈̽͌͋ ̛͉͈͓̠̗͎̜̯͆̃͛ͯ͐ͫ̇̂͠A͔̲̻̖̼̳̍͞͡N̦̞̣͓͚̼̱̈́̂̂̑ͮͥͅD̙̱́̌ͣ̓͋͞ ̷̬̟̟͓͎͎ͪ̃̈ͪ̾Y͇̜͓̬̼̐͒̾̐̒ͫ̎̅O͚̬̥̫̩̹͙͓̿̐ͬ͛͠U̜͇ͦ̅R̹̥̣̗͖̜̲͎̱̉͑ͣ́́͡ ̴͙͈̈̍ͧO̧̧̖͌B̗̼͔̠̠̈́̈̇ͮ͗͘S̴̛̫̔̋͆̊ͤ̂͐̔͢É̵̛͔̪̳̱͉̳ͮ̄̊ͅŠ̭͇̫̼ͭ͂̌́̑͂̕͘͢S̹̻̫͕͇ͦ̾ͦ͌̄ͭͥ͑ͭ͠Î̴̧̺̼̝̯͔̻̹͌͝Ȍ̵̬͖̭̻̞̳̑N͙̣͕̹̝̟͕̈̾͂̈́̐̀ ̖̭̜̹̦͚̖̫͉̊̇͆W̸͖̳̱͎͔̼͓͛̓̔ͧ̑̎I̖͓̤̥̺̙̐̑̉͛ͩ̅̎̃T̻̖̭̜̠̬͔̟ͤ̍̔͒͂̎H͍͍̲͉͔̘̲̞̳͌ͬ͊̀ͪ̔ͭ̓ ͍̘̫̇ͣ͊͐̊͟͜ͅͅT̵͍̮̣̼̺̜̃ͪͫ͌ͭ͌O͛̅ͧ̓ͯͫ͋̅̍͏̹̺̜̩͖̖͞B̛̭̭̫̙̞ͬ͜ͅY̵̱̖͉̅̎̅́͝!̴̵͚̳̙̃̀̕

What the hell is with you all? Why him?

W̱̳̪̝͙̽ͧ̉͊ͮͭ̀Ḥ̮̞̽̿ͬ͑͗͟͠Ỷ̸̨͎̹̻͔͓̮͇̺̣̃̂ ̦̝̩͓̪͍̰̋ͧͧ͗͞M̴̫̞̗̲͐̒ͬ̍̐͌ͦE̪͖͙̰̟̙̪̳ͬ͝?̮̜͈̟̻͔̃̑͂͗̚͞

WHY are you ALL so convinced that you know MY mind and MY feelings in regards that…that…

T̢̩͖̫̻̖̦̥̰͌͡Hͯ̾ͩ̈́͐͜͞͏͍̳͈̲Ȃ̷̲̼̩̜͊̏ͯ̃ͨ͠Tͥ̒ͪ҉̭̤̘̺̲͙̘̲̀ ̗͙̙̰͖͎̘̹̅͜I̷̡̻͇̺̼̜̻̒S͖̰ͩ͂̾ͦ͒̿͟͝Ŏ̸̶̲̰̩ͪͨͅS̗͖̉̃̅̒͂͘C̵͕̰͉̝ͭ̀E̒͗͢͠҉̻̮̪̜̘̖L̗͍̲̜͈̼͋̐ͬͥ̒̋̚E̸͈͖̝̝͔͙̻ͭ͂̿͂̒̓̿̄S͍̞̫̞͍͍̑̽ͦ̌̿́̚ ̷̱͈̪ͥ̿̈ͩM̛̫̯̘̪̟̲̩ͧ̈ͩ̈ͤ̎ͬͫ̚͟Ŏ̻̝̠̬̥̋̂͌ͫͤ̆̿̃͢Ń͕̳͓̯͚͇̤̤͈ͬ̒͊̅̈́ͦ̐͊Ṣ̨̖̱̱̝̳͚̗̅͊̈ͦ̄͗T͓̯̬̯͔͇͉̟̺ͪ̌̆͗̽ͩ͠Ę̸̢͔͓̎R̹̱ͩͩ̌ ̿̽̕҉̢̳̹̫I̩̞̱̱̮̎̀̒ͦ͊̃ͫ͘͡N͎̲͂ ̵̤̫̩͉͓̰̱̰͎̊͑͒̒̂H̶̠̠͋͒̉̾̀U̷ͦ̚҉̸̘͎̥M̵̪̳̦̞̽̓̍͗ͫ͘͟A̷̗͍͔̺̲̣ͭ͗ͥ̀N̡̛̥͍̘͈̟̣̫ͬ̽̅̈̇̔ ̲͍̣̲ͧͭͯ͌ͤͬ̚͜C̡͖̫͙̝̠̬̒͛͆̉ͪͤL͍̘̝̠͉͖̫̝̅̽̔ͨͦ͊̈O̴̞̼̱ͫ̇̈́̈ͥ͜T̶̬͚͈̩̬̳̮͗̒̈́ͦ͂̋͛̿͡ͅH̙̲̤͍̜̜͈̜͕ͭ̉ͪ͡͞I̤̲͍̩͙̱͖̓ͥ̿ͭ̑N̷̬̗͌́̀Ǧ̴̳̞̋ͭ̆ͩ͜?͇̼̜̗͉͇̺̻̹͛̽ͨ͆͡!̸̦̜͇͕͌ͫ͗ͭ͊͟

YES I am “really only watching Toby” because that’s what you DO when you find an ignorant child-aged reincarnation of your own worst enemy! I mean, what kind of monster do you think I am? Do you think my only options were to either kill him or leave him to his fate? Do you really think that I am such a terrible being that ANY action other than those MUST automatically mean that I harbor some personal emotional attachment?

D͙̙͍̈́ͭ̊́͝Ǫ̦̝̮̎͆͒̅͌́̚ ͬ̏ͬ̒ͩ̃́̾͏̺Y̯͔̩͑͌̓ͭ̐̈́ͨ̚O̤ͧ͐͘U̡͉̿͗͗̂́ͪͭ̄͘?̯̟̤̎͆ͩ͌͗ͫͨ͌́͝͠

…Okay, I admit that maybe I deserve it if you think that. I have done terrible things. I am a demon. Still, your logic in this matter is simplistic and overreaches itself. Nobody is limited strictly to “love” and “hate” as modes of operation and motive. Just because my actions do not speak of overt, immediate, or hasty anger or hatred – in other words, just because I allowed him a chance to prove he is not the monster he once was – does not mean that they automatically translate to love.

Please, you and all others, listen to me rather than over-analyze my every move through the lens of emotion you wish to see there. You asked these questions. Now accept my answers.

Blinding

oreramar:

A/N: I have no idea what Mod M has planned for Ian, but even if everything turns out well and Bill is defeated the events of Reincarnation Blues will seriously color Dipper’s relationship with Toby…

The
worst part was how innocent Toby looked, especially while he slept. Small, and
fragile, and peaceful, as though the universe hadn’t dealt him a bum hand early
on in life, as though it hadn’t then proceeded to burn cards right out of his
fingers in the years after. As though his soul had never been that of the
craftiest demon Dipper had ever known…

Innocent,
weak, fragile – someone to be protected and sheltered and loved. But he couldn’t
afford to think of the boy that way. Not after what Bill did to him – not after
what Bill managed with Ian.

No
soul should be able to reach across lifetimes and pull the strings of their
future selves. No soul should escape being washed clean in rebirth on purpose – yet somehow Bill had, or so
he claimed, and now Dipper wrestled almost daily with the deep fear that he
was, once again, playing directly into the other demon’s plans.

Keep reading

Maybe one of the times Toby get’s kidnapped by a cult(again) and the end up summoning Alcor and he kind of just unceremoniously appears and is like ‘Toby, did you get kidnapped by a cult, *again*?’ and he’s like ‘It wasn’t my fault this time!’ and Alcor kind of just facepalms, walks out of the circle, scaring the shit out of the cult members, grabs Toby’s arm and is just like ‘Come on, we’re going home and talking about how to summon me when you get kidnapped again.’ and the cult is so confused

Dipper once again wonders what he did to deserve this.

Toby-1.0-all.zip

randumbdaze:

I made a tiny Transcendence AU visual novel. Tiny little game. More of a demo. Requires a download of the whole folder.

I was gonna make something bigger but I realized how much effort goes into the writing. If anyone wants to help me write more paths, more characters, a bigger story–message me or reblog this saying so! We’ll create a new channel on Slack or something.

Game?

GAME?!?!

GAAAAAME?!

Toby-1.0-all.zip

Mod Talk: Toby Feels

[7/21/2015 9:45:18 PM] Ariel Ptak: (god, now I’m just thinking of all the “Toby growing up” feels)
[7/21/2015 9:45:33 PM] Seiya: GO ON
[7/21/2015 9:45:48 PM] Ariel Ptak: (like the moment Alcor very suddenly realizes that while he’s always kind of thought of Toby as this tiny tiny kid…suddenly he’s just as tall as Alcor himself.)

[7/21/2015 9:46:07 PM] Ariel Ptak: (like, Alcor can’t properly LOOM anymore unless he purposefully stretches a few more inches or hovers off the ground)
[7/21/2015 9:46:22 PM] Ariel Ptak: (and even then it’s just not the massive difference in size it once was)
[7/21/2015 9:47:18 PM] Seiya: if only because its obvious that hes having to float in order to loom also YES
[7/21/2015 9:48:08 PM] Ariel Ptak: (just the realization that Toby’s not a child anymore, that he’s practically an adult or will be in very little time and then he’ll be going off on his own and who knows what could happen to him out there…)
[7/21/2015 9:48:24 PM] Seiya: MAI HART
[7/21/2015 9:48:40 PM] Seiya: (especially since toby is a bleeding heart and fuck knows what will happen to him out there)
[7/21/2015 9:48:46 PM] Ariel Ptak: (exactly)
[7/21/2015 9:48:52 PM] Ariel Ptak: (karma hates him. Dipper knows this.)
[7/21/2015 9:50:32 PM] Seiya: (toby ends up taking care of himself just fine but dipper worries-….um
[7/21/2015 9:50:32 PM] Ariel Ptak: (the universe can and probably will do who knows what to his kid, who is not his kid, who is an adult and should be perfectly self-sufficient because Dipper has made sure to teach him as well as he can, but even so Toby’s probably going to get suckered by someone or hit by a bus or something)
[7/21/2015 9:50:34 PM] Seiya: doesn’t worry
[7/21/2015 9:50:34 PM] Seiya: at all
[7/21/2015 9:50:36 PM] Seiya: nope)
[7/21/2015 9:51:57 PM] Ariel Ptak: Dipper “okay seriously, if anyone ever tries to pull one over on you, I don’t care if it’s your boss or your landlord or whatever, you call me and I’ll come set them straight just because nobody’s allowed to do that to you except me, if I feel like it, or something” Pines
[7/21/2015 9:52:38 PM] Seiya: YAS
[7/21/2015 9:53:25 PM] Ariel Ptak: Dipper “you know you don’t HAVE to move out at eighteen, just because that’s when you’re legally emancipated doesn’t mean you’ve got to or anything, if you’re not ready – I mean, if there’s still any reason why I have to keep an eye on you or anything – then it’s probably better if you stay and go to school locally or something” Pines
[7/21/2015 9:54:09 PM] Seiya: YAS
[7/21/2015 9:54:32 PM] Ariel Ptak: Dipper “when the hell did you get so tall this isn’t right what happened did you get your hands on some kind of growing crystal magic you should know better than to use magics you don’t know the source of and without my supervision now change back this instant” Pines 😛
[7/21/2015 9:54:33 PM] Seiya: dipper “i just need free babysitting okay, NO OTHER REASON AT ALL” pines
[7/21/2015 9:55:18 PM] Seiya: dipper “you’re awful thin are you taking care of yourself i’m worrie-….worried that you’ll turn to evil to feed yourself let me cook you a four course meal to fix that” pines
[7/21/2015 9:55:23 PM] Ariel Ptak: Dipper “so Maddie was asking about you, for some reason the kid seems to like you, so are you coming to dinner this weekend or not?” Pines
[7/21/2015 9:56:00 PM] Ariel Ptak: Dipper “Maddie misses you come visit for the holidays” Pines
[7/21/2015 9:56:54 PM] Ariel Ptak: oh god, the first time Toby gets a cold while he’s on his own, like in the dorms or something, and he either mentions it in passing or else calls for a little advice…
[7/21/2015 9:57:28 PM] Seiya: he shows up with a bandolier of tissue boxes
[7/21/2015 9:57:35 PM] Ariel Ptak: just looking for confirmation that yeah, he’s remembering right when he thinks that the self-care regimen includes a lot of liquids and so forth
[7/21/2015 9:59:40 PM] Zoey McTwiddydinkles: “ugh youre such a pain – no, lay your ass back down on that bed. here’s an ice pack for your head. you like chicken noodle, right? whatever, i’ll make what i find first. not just because its your favorite. i wouldnt know. hey you keep shivering here’s another blanket. got enough tissues? no no stay there i’ll get them,”
[7/21/2015 9:59:40 PM] Ariel Ptak: instead he gets the whole rundown on EVERYTHING you can do to help yourself get over a cold, an entire prescription of naps and tissues and soups and teas and compresses and who knows what else with strict instructions to go see the nurse as soon as it gets any worse and threats to come and check in on him just to make sure he’s not doing something stupid that could possibly put himself at risk of evil through the sheer annoyance of a lingering cough
[7/21/2015 10:00:50 PM] Zoey McTwiddydinkles: “d – alcor, im an adult i can do this myself… ” “NO NO I’M ALREADY HERE AND I HAVE NOTHING ELSE TO DO, SHUT UP”
[7/21/2015 10:01:58 PM] Ariel Ptak: oh man, though, “Tyrone” showing up at Toby’s dorm room door with soup and tissues as though it’s perfectly normal for a parent to somehow know their kid is sick and manage to travel who knows how long just to bring them these things, not to mention get past electronic locks on the dorm buildings and so forth…
[7/21/2015 10:02:24 PM] Ariel Ptak: Lucky if Toby’s roommate(s?) aren’t there to question it
[7/21/2015 10:02:34 PM] Ariel Ptak: Then Toby’s free to tell him off himself
[7/21/2015 10:02:41 PM] Ariel Ptak: “Alcor you’re not supposed to be here!”
[7/21/2015 10:03:09 PM] Ariel Ptak: “Alcor you aren’t authorized to be in this building, you don’t have a keycard to get past the locks, people are going to ask questions!”
[7/21/2015 10:03:15 PM] Zoey McTwiddydinkles: “IM A BEING OF PURE ENERGY WITH NO WEAKNESSES, I DO WHAT I WANT”
[7/21/2015 10:03:42 PM] Ariel Ptak: “I can take care of myself, really, I just wanted to make sure that I was right about the whole ‘flushing the system’ thing with the soups and juices and teas!”
[7/21/2015 10:06:00 PM] Seiya: dipper “i regularly carry three rolled up blankets strapped to my back nbd” pines
[7/21/2015 10:06:04 PM] Ariel Ptak: “You’re masquerading as a HUMAN right now, and humans can’t do things like walk through locked doors without keys or past manned desks without being seen!”
[7/21/2015 10:06:33 PM] Ariel Ptak: Dipper “yeah so these blankets were probably going to be eaten by moths, they were just sitting around at home, so I figured I’d unload them on you” Pines
[7/21/2015 10:07:33 PM] Seiya: dipper the backhanded dad
[7/21/2015 10:07:43 PM] Seiya: toby the kid that could pay his way through college playing poker
[7/21/2015 10:07:54 PM] Ariel Ptak: oh god yes
[7/21/2015 10:08:32 PM] Ariel Ptak: Toby just looks so innocent and yet is so good at reading people and situations and stuff that he could probably sucker and con anyone if he wasn’t too nice to make a habit – or a career – of it
[7/21/2015 10:08:49 PM] Ariel Ptak: he’s probably picked things up from Alcor, even inadvertently
[7/21/2015 10:09:51 PM] Kassondra Ptak: if not all of it, he certainly pays for a good chunk that way
[7/21/2015 10:10:09 PM] Ariel Ptak: That’s how he gets money for textbooks

In the Drift au, how does the way Alcor act towards Ian and later Toby change?

Depends on how Dipper reacts to those vital years without human contact. the Drift AU isn’t necessarily defined by Dipper being more unhinged, it’s defined by the timespan (generally 6 years or so) that he goes without being able to converse without his family and friends.

One natural reaction to this would be for him to lose himself more as a demon. He could very much become more like Bill, with a greater lack of sympathy and more thirst for chaos.

However, he could also go the opposite extreme. He could become more withdrawn, more guilty that he has to do terrible things in order to gain more power to see his family again. He could become far more timid, more self conscious of his demonic presence.

In either case, he could very well heal over Mabel’s lifetime and eventually converge with what we consider his canon self in TAU to be. Or, he could stay that way.

I feel that each scenario is too interesting to deem just one as a Drift AU canon. On one hand, it’s sometimes fun to have a stark contrast and have a more sadistic Alcor and see how (and if) he gets accepted by Mabel’s family. On the other, it’s sort of a whole other monster to see him far, far more aware of how scary he is to other people, how much power he has over others, to see him as slightly more stoic and sad – which in some cases, may make him seem even scarier.

So to answer your question: if you go the former, “bad end” route, Ian… probably wouldn’t live long after Alcor finds him. Unfortunately, same goes for Toby, though he’s got a better chance at being found either too uninteresting, or a fitting pitiful life for one such as Bill.

The latter would probably entail their safety, and Alcor would certainly be distraught with how conflicted he is (much like in canon) – but he may actually accept both faster, and be more aware of how easily he intimidates poor them with his past-life grudge. Toby could actually be welcomed with open arms immediately, since this version of Alcor would probably hang more onto how Ian redeemed himself.