Tag: candy

At some point in time, there will be an orphanage, and every orphan their was in one of their past lives friends with Dip/Alcor, so Cassie, Mabel, Stan, Malala, the triplets, Henry, Candy, Grenda, Wendy, Soos, Melanie, Jeremiah, all of them. I would really like to read a fic where all of them interact in this one orphanage (bonus points if the orphanage is the sentient shack! Omg Stan could have a toy shark!

On one hand this is a highly specific orphanage.

On the other hand, this is adorable

Meat Cute, 6/?

seiya234:

Or there is both cuteness and angst. Thanks once again to zilleniose for prompting me, and marypsue for beta’ing.

Previous parts here. 

———————————————————

“Hey Henry!”

Henry winced slightly. Mabel’s voice through the phone not only blasted out an eardrum but had made several of the patrons by him look around for a second for the source of the noise.

Henry surreptitiously turned down the volume on the receiver.

Imminent sonic explosions quelled, Henry said, “what’s up Mabes?”

“You doin’ anything after work?”

“Don’t think so.” Well, technically he was planning on an evening of catching up on some trade magazines and maybe reorganizing Uncle Tyler’s bookshelf but he’d definitely rather spend the time with Mabel.

“Me and Candy are going to blow stuff up. Wanna come?”

“Did you say blow stuff up?”

“Yeah it’s going to be great!!”

Henry imagined his girlfriend with explosives. It was probably a terrible idea but he found himself saying, “Sure honey, I’d love to.”

Read More

Mod Chat!

Or, Mods M and S got really excited on Skype. Under the cut for length!

[2/16/2015 9:46:48
PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: was Rosa recognisable as a reincarnation? Because
I feel like she’s one of the most obvious ones I’ve done so far but then again
nobody’s said anything about Alice yet and I don’t know whether that’s because
I went too obvious or not obvious enough, and so I can’t be sure with Rosa
either.

[2/16/2015 9:47:09 PM] Seiya: wait alice was a
reincarnation?

[2/16/2015 9:47:12 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: YEP

[2/16/2015 9:47:19 PM] Seiya: it’s not you or your writing!

[2/16/2015 9:47:23 PM] Seiya: i am just very horribly
oblivious

[2/16/2015 9:48:00 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: No it’s
cool I just wasn’t sure whether I made it so obvious that no one felt the need
to mention it or so not obvious that nobody noticed, and it’ls good to know
which!

[2/16/2015 9:54:24
PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: But yeah. Definitely thought I gave the game away
when I had Dipper mention PT Barnum in the context of Alice’s past lives.
Apparently PT Barnum is not such a household name in other households.

[2/16/2015 9:55:16 PM] Seiya: HAH

[2/16/2015 9:55:18 PM] Seiya: NOW I GET IT

[2/16/2015 9:55:20 PM] Seiya: THAT IS WONDERFUL

[2/16/2015 9:55:22 PM] Seiya: HAHAHHAHA

[2/16/2015 9:55:24 PM] Seiya: LOVE IT

[2/16/2015 9:55:54 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: :takes a
bow:

[2/16/2015 10:04:57
PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: So I’m actually a teensy bit worried about the
bit with the freaky gift because I’m operating on the assumption that it takes
at least, like, a millennium for Bill to reincarnate, so I’m thinking Dipper
would be a leeeeeeetle tiny bit less, how do I put this, overall generally sane
(or at least sane by human standards) by that point, which was also the
assumption I was using when I decided that sure, he might attack Ian
physically.

[2/16/2015 10:05:35 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: However I
wrote that section from his perspective and I’m not sure if that came across,
if it just seems OOC, or if it’s waaaay too heavy-handed.

[2/16/2015 10:05:44 PM] Seiya: nah it came across

[2/16/2015 10:05:57 PM] Seiya: one of the things we’ve
talked about in the past is that dipper has a harder time holding on to his
sanity

[2/16/2015 10:06:01 PM] Seiya: and his humaity the older he
gets

[2/16/2015 10:06:11 PM] Seiya: because human minds weren’t
meant to be pmuch immortal

[2/16/2015 10:06:25 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: Yeah good
because I have a whole snippet that’s basically ‘this is your brain on
immortality’

[2/16/2015 10:06:53 PM] Seiya: LET ME LOVE YOUUUUUUUUUU

[2/16/2015 10:07:10 PM] Seiya: personally because i am a
fucking sap. I like to think that even when dipper has completely lost touch
with everything

[2/16/2015 10:07:19 PM] Seiya: he still watches out for kids
that cross his path

[2/16/2015 10:07:25 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: AWW

[2/16/2015 10:07:25 PM] Seiya: and makes sure they’re okay

[2/16/2015 10:07:27 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: yes

[2/16/2015 10:07:56 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: I mean I
am all about fucking weird inhuman thought processes/fae morals

[2/16/2015 10:09:34
PM] Seiya: just even when alcor ends up scaring the kids half the time because
he’s forgotten what its like to deal with little ones

[2/16/2015 10:09:42 PM] Seiya: and gives them highly
inappropriate gifts

[2/16/2015 10:09:43 PM] Seiya: just

[2/16/2015 10:09:50 PM] Seiya: big scary demon protecting
babs 2k15

[2/16/2015 10:14:28
PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: Tiny triplet babs menaced by big scary
toe-munching demon

[2/16/2015 10:14:32 PM] Seiya: OH MY GOD YES

[2/16/2015 10:14:47 PM] Seiya: tiny triplet babs falling
asleep on big scary all black and fire demon

[2/16/2015 10:14:52 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: YES

[2/16/2015 10:15:08 PM] Seiya: dipper having an episode and
only able to speak in static and eldrich horror type noises

[2/16/2015 10:15:21 PM] Seiya: triplet babs giggling because
uncle dipper is making funny noises wheeeee

[2/16/2015 10:15:23 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: The
triplets just LAUGHING and trying to imitate him

[2/16/2015 10:15:42 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: (Willow’s
surprisingly good at it)

[2/16/2015 10:16:08 PM] Seiya: willow can get uncanny valley
pretty quick lol

[2/16/2015 10:16:14 PM] Seiya: oh nooooo henry coming home

[2/16/2015 10:16:20 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: Oh
nooooooo

[2/16/2015 10:16:23 PM] Seiya: to see dipper making noises
that almost make his ears bleed

[2/16/2015 10:16:27 PM] Seiya: and babs copying him

[2/16/2015 10:16:29 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: aw darling

[2/16/2015 10:16:35 PM] Seiya: he isn’t sure if this is more
adorable or terrrifying

[2/16/2015 10:16:35 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: poor
cinnamon bun

[2/16/2015 10:16:37 PM] Seiya: terdorable

[2/16/2015 10:16:40 PM] Seiya: adorafying

[2/16/2015 10:16:59 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: I like
‘adorafying’ I think it’ll stick

[2/16/2015 10:17:42 PM] Seiya: much of what happens to henry

[2/16/2015 10:17:45 PM] Seiya: is adorafying

[2/16/2015 10:17:50 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: This is
true.

[2/16/2015 10:17:57 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: Some of
it’s just plain old terrifying, of course.

[2/16/2015 10:18:11 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: But mostly
it’ls adorable as well.

[2/16/2015 10:19:01 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: Man you
know what I am craving? More random-inhabitants-of-GF-interacting-with-post-Transcendence-twins
fic.

[2/16/2015 10:19:07 PM] Seiya: GO ON

[2/16/2015 10:20:00 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: Just
like…Ranger McGucket(? the son, I’m absolute shite at remembering names)
getting pissed as hell because Dipper Pines dried up the lake AGAIN

[2/16/2015 10:20:26 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: The arcade
manager having to have a talk with Mabel and Soos about the fact that Soos
holds every high score in the place overnight

[2/16/2015 10:20:36 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: (to be
fair, he did actually earn most of them)

[2/16/2015 10:20:41 PM] Seiya: ooooooh yessss

[2/16/2015 10:20:41 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: (Dipper
only helped with a couple)

[2/16/2015 10:20:56 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: (and wih
breaking them all in for an all-night video game party)

[2/16/2015 10:21:02 PM] Seiya: blubs and durland tryin to
clock dipper on their radar

[2/16/2015 10:21:04 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: YES

[2/16/2015 10:21:06 PM] Seiya: he breaks their radar also
YES

[2/16/2015 10:21:22 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: having
trouble because he can’lt stay corporeal long enough to get a proper read

[2/16/2015 10:21:44 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: Dipper
gets elected by a bunch of dryads to go and have a Talk with Manly Dan about
punching trees when he’s upset

[2/16/2015 10:22:05 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: (it ends
with tearful confessions over ice cream)

[2/16/2015 10:22:12 PM] Seiya: oh god and you know that’s
even better when manly dan and dipper become family…ish

[2/16/2015 10:22:23 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: (turns out
Manly Dan is also a closet BABBA fan)

[2/16/2015 10:22:26 PM] Seiya: YEEEEEEEEEEEE

[2/16/2015 10:23:14 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: also

[2/16/2015 10:23:18 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: the pranks

[2/16/2015 10:23:26 PM] Seiya: sweet baby jesus yes

[2/16/2015 10:23:33 PM] Seiya: candy trying out weapons on
dipper

[2/16/2015 10:23:37 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: YES

[2/16/2015 10:23:44 PM] Seiya: henry having a heart attack
when he walks in on them doing that

[2/16/2015 10:23:49 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: YES YES

[2/16/2015 10:24:02 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: he thinks
that something’s gone horribly wrong and nearl takes a bullet for Dipper

[2/16/2015 10:24:15 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: thankfully
it’s extradimensional so it passes harmlessly through him

[2/16/2015 10:24:21 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: but it’s
the thought that counts

[2/16/2015 10:24:40 PM] Seiya: YYEEEEEEEEEEE

[2/16/2015 10:36:08
PM] Seiya:
https://40.media.tumblr.com/a8c179517e5567db4be86ecf33fffbdb/tumblr_njw8mh2ykX1tum2jzo1_540.png

[2/16/2015 10:36:12 PM] Seiya: manly dan and tyler 2k15

[2/16/2015 10:36:21 PM] Seiya: i mean manly dan prolly saw
this face at the bar

[2/16/2015 10:36:32 PM] Seiya: and was like ‘god damnit he’s
adorable’

[2/16/2015 10:36:38 PM] Seiya: but tyler had to be the one
to actually go up to dan

[2/16/2015 10:36:41 PM] Seiya: dan was too bashful

[2/16/2015 10:36:48 PM] Seiya: tyler tells the triplets
about how they met all the time

[2/16/2015 10:36:52 PM] Seiya: and makes dan blush

[2/16/2015 10:46:20
PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: also omg what a baby face

[2/16/2015 10:46:26 PM] Seiya: I KNOW

[2/16/2015 10:46:39 PM] Seiya: Uncle Tyler is deffo the
cutest uncle according to acacia

[2/16/2015 10:46:46 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: HE’S TOO
FUCKING CUTE

[2/16/2015 10:47:08 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: Mabel
hotly contests that, Dipper is just totaly fine with not being the cute uncle

[2/16/2015 10:47:42 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: He’s the
totally terrifying all-powerful uncle, Mabel, that is just as good if not
better.

[2/16/2015 10:47:56 PM] Seiya: tyler has to agree with that
one

[2/16/2015 10:48:04 PM] Seiya: then he and dipper continue
drinking their hot tea

[2/16/2015 10:48:07 PM] Seiya: with a slice of lemon

[2/16/2015 10:48:08 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: 😀

[2/16/2015 10:48:11 PM] Seiya: and two cubes of sugar

[2/16/2015 10:48:22 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: UNCLE TEA
PARTY

[2/16/2015 10:48:25 PM] Seiya: YA

[2/16/2015 10:48:33 PM] Seiya: dan and tyler serving as
another set of hnorary grandparents

[2/16/2015 10:48:37 PM] Seiya: since the pines are kind of
meh

[2/16/2015 10:48:38 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: 😀

[2/16/2015 10:48:47 PM] Seiya: and We Do Not Talk To Henry’s
Parents

[2/16/2015 10:48:49 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: TOO CUTE

[2/16/2015 10:48:52 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: guh no

[2/16/2015 10:48:59 PM] Seiya: (Dan and Arnold got into a
literal fistfight the last time they saw each other)

[2/16/2015 10:49:01 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: Henry’s
parents :shudder:

[2/16/2015 10:49:08 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: omfg

[2/16/2015 10:49:18 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: (Stan
tried to sell tickets? Stan tried to sell tickets.)

[2/16/2015 10:49:59 PM] Seiya: stan tried to sell tickets

[2/16/2015 10:50:08 PM] Seiya: dan kicked arnold’s ass

[2/16/2015 10:50:09 PM] Seiya: tbf

[2/16/2015 10:50:22 PM] Seiya: dan had to already break
another brother’s nose after what he said about tyler

[2/16/2015 10:50:26 PM] Seiya: so he’s used to it

[2/16/2015 10:50:44 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: Manly
Daaaaaaaaaaan

[2/16/2015 10:51:23 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: (so in
largely unrelated news I definitely saw an hc about Dan being ftm trans and I
have 100% adopted it)

[2/16/2015 10:51:43 PM] Seiya: a yes

[2/16/2015 10:51:47 PM] Seiya: b what if

[2/16/2015 10:51:52 PM] Seiya: dan had wendy and her
brothers

[2/16/2015 10:51:56 PM] Seiya: before he transitioned?

[2/16/2015 10:52:00 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: EXACTLY
WHAT I WAS THINKIKNG

[2/16/2015 10:52:05 PM] Seiya: HI5

[2/16/2015 10:52:10 PM] Seiya: oh god

[2/16/2015 10:52:16 PM] Seiya: dan talking to willow

[2/16/2015 10:52:26 PM] Seiya: willow like “i want my
own kids? but without a partner?”

[2/16/2015 10:52:35 PM] Seiya: and dan like “yeah, ive
done that you’ll be fine”

[2/16/2015 10:52:39 PM] Seiya: and then goes back to fish
punching

[2/16/2015 10:52:40 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: awwwwww

[2/16/2015 10:52:42 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: YEAH

[2/16/2015 10:53:39 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: (Wendy
trying to stop Dan from punching EVERYTHING like ‘Dad you’re going to hurt
yourself’ and Dan like ‘HAH a broken hand’s got NOTHING on childbirth’)

[2/16/2015 10:54:18 PM] Seiya: dipper all like O_O because
this is the first he’s heard of it and dan just looks at him like “come at
me bro”

[2/16/2015 10:54:22 PM] Seiya: dipper does not come at him
bro

[2/16/2015 10:54:29 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: excellent
choice dip

[2/16/2015 10:54:41 PM] Seiya: dan could probably break
dipper in half still lol

[2/16/2015 10:54:48 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: lol
definitely

[2/16/2015 10:55:17
PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: shortly after they figure out how to make Dipper
solid

[2/16/2015 10:55:24 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: he challenges
Dan to an armwrestling match

[2/16/2015 10:55:53 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: because
he’ls going to prove for once and for all that OKAY HE IS REALLY POWERFUL NOW
YOU CAN ALL SHUT UP ABOUT THE MANLINESS TEST

[2/16/2015 10:55:59 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: (Dan
totally owns him)

[2/16/2015 10:56:03 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: (Dipper
sulks)

[2/16/2015 10:56:09 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: (for,
like, a week)

[2/16/2015 10:56:27 PM] Seiya: OH MY LORD YES

[2/16/2015 10:56:38 PM] Seiya: dipper is like “I CAN
LITERALLY DO ANYTHING I AM A BEING OF PURE ENERGY”

[2/16/2015 10:56:50 PM] Seiya: mabel all like “nah bro
you’re scared of dan a bit and that’s why you lost’

[2/16/2015 10:56:51 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: (he may be
an all-knowing all-powerful demon master of the mind)

[2/16/2015 10:56:58 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: (but he
still has noodle arms)

[2/16/2015 10:56:59 PM] Seiya: dipper all like WE ARE NEVER
SPEAKING OF THIS AGAIN

[2/16/2015 10:57:01 PM] Seiya: AND YES

[2/16/2015 10:57:02 PM] Seiya: YEEEEEEEEEEE

[2/16/2015 10:57:03 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: YES

[2/16/2015 10:57:22 PM] Seiya: dan and henry and wendy
taking the kids out to do corduroy things

[2/16/2015 10:57:30 PM] Seiya: because henry doesn’t speak
with his parents

[2/16/2015 10:57:34 PM] Seiya: but he’s still a corduroy

[2/16/2015 10:57:35 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: awwwwwwwww
babs

[2/16/2015 10:57:38 PM] Seiya: and there are somethings
corduroys do

[2/16/2015 10:57:47 PM] Seiya: ie fish, cut down trees, and
having burping contests

[2/16/2015 10:57:47 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: EVERY ONCE
IN A WHILE YOU JUST GOTTA HIT A TREE WITH AN AXE

[2/16/2015 10:57:50 PM] Seiya: YES

[2/16/2015 10:58:20 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: They take
Mabel on exactly one of these excursions and are all terrified by how much she
takes to it

[2/16/2015 10:58:45 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: They all
agree that unless they want all further Corduroy excursions to include
makeovers and glitter fish lures, Mabel will get her own camping trips

[2/16/2015 10:58:49 PM] Seiya: mabel wins the burping
contest easily

[2/16/2015 10:58:51 PM] Seiya: ALSO YES

[2/16/2015 10:59:29 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: Oh man
Mabel can burp the entire chorus of ‘Don’t Start Un-Believing’l and you know it

[2/16/2015 10:59:46 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: Also the
first five lines of ‘The Star-Spangled Banner’

[2/16/2015 11:00:00 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: She did it
once at a baseball game and her parents were mortified

[2/16/2015 11:00:17 PM] Seiya: OH GOD

[2/16/2015 11:00:19 PM] Seiya: SHE TEACHES THE KIDS

[2/16/2015 11:00:22 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: YES

[2/16/2015 11:00:30
PM] Seiya: ACACIA CAN BURP THE ENTIRE STAR SPANGLED BANNER

[2/16/2015 11:00:33 PM] Seiya: MABEL IS SO PROUD

[2/16/2015 11:00:36 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary:
YEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSSSS

[2/16/2015 11:00:47 PM] Seiya: willow does some mean armpit
farts…thanks mom!

[2/16/2015 11:00:55 PM] Seiya: hank is vaguely mortified by
his sisters tbh

[2/16/2015 11:01:00 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: oh my god

[2/16/2015 11:01:46 PM] Seiya: hank can be a little shy at
times blessums

[2/16/2015 11:02:09 PM] Seiya: tyler teaches them how to
mend their clothes

[2/16/2015 11:02:12 PM] Seiya: mabel is good at crochet

[2/16/2015 11:02:19 PM] Seiya: a little miffy on buttons

[2/16/2015 11:02:22 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: Aw man
yeah

[2/16/2015 11:02:41 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: Tyler
totally has a closet full of like, actual costumes though

[2/16/2015 11:02:49 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: and
definitely makes them all himself

[2/16/2015 11:02:51 PM] Seiya: 😀 😀 😀

[2/16/2015 11:03:00 PM] Seiya: MABEL AND TYLER GETTING INTO
A COSTUME OFF

[2/16/2015 11:03:06 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: YEAH

[2/16/2015 11:03:09 PM] Seiya: MABEL AND TYLER BOTH MAKING
COSTUMES FOR THE TRIPLETS

[2/16/2015 11:03:16 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: YEAHHHHHH

[2/16/2015 11:03:16 PM] Seiya: SHENANIGANS ENSUE

[2/16/2015 11:03:33 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: WHOEVER
WINS THE COSTUME-OFF GETS HALLOWEEN RIGHTS FOR THE YEAR

[2/16/2015 11:04:05 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: The loser
gets to make the Summerween costumes. Mabel’s not totally heartless. (Because
she’s going to win. Obviously. Right?)

[2/16/2015 11:06:13
PM] Seiya: oh lord

[2/16/2015 11:06:18 PM] Seiya: lazy susan giving dipper pie

[2/16/2015 11:06:19 PM] Seiya: all the time

[2/16/2015 11:06:26 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: Oh gosh

[2/16/2015 11:06:32 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: even when he
can’t eat it

[2/16/2015 11:06:53 PM] Seiya: YES

[2/16/2015 11:06:55 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: even
before they figure out how to make him solid

[2/16/2015 11:06:58 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: he still
gets a piece

[2/16/2015 11:06:59 PM] Seiya: DOUBLE YES

[2/16/2015 11:07:19 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: and after
they figure out how to make him solid it’s like double slices or just WHOLE
PIES

[2/16/2015 11:07:32 PM] Seiya: dipper cries the first time
he can eat a whole pie

[2/16/2015 11:07:58 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: (at first
because he ate the slice Susan left so quickly that she wasn’t sure she’d even
given him one)

[2/16/2015 11:08:27 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: (then just
because THT BOY HAS TO BE STARVING, HASN’T BEEN ABLE TO EVEN TOUCH FOOD FOR HOW
LONG.)

[2/16/2015 11:08:38 PM] Seiya: OH NO THAT’S ADORABLE

[2/16/2015 11:08:40 PM] Seiya: ALSO YES

[2/16/2015 11:09:01 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: (LOOK AT
HOW FAST HE SNARFED THAT SLICE DOWN. POOR THING. GOTTA PUT SOME MEAT ON THOSE
BONES.)

[2/16/2015 11:09:35 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: Mabel
tries to explain how the ‘being of pure energy’ thing works once and both she
and Susan have to go home with a headache

[2/16/2015 11:10:10 PM] Seiya: squeebles

[2/16/2015 11:10:24 PM] Seiya: dipper giving toby an
exclusive scope

[2/16/2015 11:10:26 PM] Seiya: scoop

[2/16/2015 11:10:29 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: eeeeeeeeee

[2/16/2015 11:10:51 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: I love the
idea of Toby’s paper turning into the one reliable source of news in GF
post-Transcendence

[2/16/2015 11:11:04 PM] Seiya: OOOOOOOOOOO

[2/16/2015 11:11:05 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: kind of
like Lee Jordan’s radio station in Harry Potter

[2/16/2015 11:14:36
PM] Seiya: DIPPER AND THE MULTIBEAR BEING BROS

[2/16/2015 11:14:47 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: YES

[2/16/2015 11:17:03 PM] Seiya: still thinking about minor
characters in tau

[2/16/2015 11:17:08 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: Ooooh?

[2/16/2015 11:17:34 PM] Seiya: dipper doing something really
sweet for tambry after henry and mabel get married

[2/16/2015 11:17:39 PM] Seiya: because her party is where
tehy met

[2/16/2015 11:17:47 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: Aw dude
that is too cute

[2/16/2015 11:18:38 PM] Seiya: dipper and robbie still kind
of side eying each other

[2/16/2015 11:19:05 PM] Seiya: ABUELITA CHASING DIPPER OFF
WITH A BROOM THE FIRST TIME SHE SEES HIM

[2/16/2015 11:19:07 PM] Seiya: before soos explains

[2/16/2015 11:19:12 PM] Seiya: then eventually

[2/16/2015 11:19:15 PM] Seiya: she’s all like

[2/16/2015 11:19:20 PM] Seiya: you talking bad about dipper
bab?

[2/16/2015 11:19:23 PM] Seiya: i will kill you

[2/16/2015 11:19:34 PM] Seiya: with this convienetly sharp
knife i have near by

[2/16/2015 11:19:45 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: That
reminds me, we got one ask about whether Dipper would restore memories that the
Society of the Blind Eye took, which makes me wonder – would Robbie jus be SO
FULL OF HIMSELF that he TOTALLY CALLED IT that there was something weird about
that Pines kid?

[2/16/2015 11:19:52 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: ALSO
ABUELITA OMFG YES

[2/16/2015 11:20:02 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: man this
AU needs more Soos

[2/16/2015 11:20:04 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: also

[2/16/2015 11:20:07 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: (emo)

[2/16/2015 11:21:11 PM] Seiya: YE

[2/16/2015 11:21:12 PM] Seiya: also omg

[2/16/2015 11:21:17 PM] Seiya: smug!robbie LOL

[2/16/2015 11:21:54 PM] Seiya: smug!robbie being a hipster
like "yeah i knew alcor before he was weird”

[2/16/2015 11:22:28 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: THAT
DEFINITELY HAPPENS

[2/16/2015 11:22:35 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: he
definitely uses it to pick up girls

[2/16/2015 11:22:47 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: ‘oh yeah
Alcor’s a personal friend of mine’

[2/16/2015 11:23:02 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: ‘we’re,
like, total bros’

[2/16/2015 11:23:31 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: ‘psssshhhh
I don’t draw _fanart_ of him being all cool and demon-y, what are you talking
about’

[2/16/2015 11:23:35 PM] Seiya: IM

[2/16/2015 11:23:37 PM] Seiya: IM GONNA PISS

[2/16/2015 11:23:42 PM] Seiya: dipper not minding

[2/16/2015 11:23:46 PM] Seiya: because he finds this
hysterical

[2/16/2015 11:24:43 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: OH MY FUCK
THOUGH

[2/16/2015 11:24:48 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: ROBBIE
USING THT LINE

[2/16/2015 11:24:49 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: ON

[2/16/2015 11:24:51 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: A

[2/16/2015 11:24:53 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: CULTIST

[2/16/2015 11:24:59 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: NOT
KNOWING SHE’S ONE

[2/16/2015 11:25:13 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: ‘yeah
Alcor and me…we’re tightl

[2/16/2015 11:25:23 PM] Seiya: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

[2/16/2015 11:25:27 PM] Seiya: DIPPER HAVING TO SAVE HIS ASS

[2/16/2015 11:25:46 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: ‘if I lied
about something like that he’d totally eat my soul or whatever so you know it’s
the truth’

[2/16/2015 11:26:01 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: ‘Really?
That’s so…_dark_.’

[2/16/2015 11:26:09 PM] Seiya: OH MY GOOOOOOOOOOD

[2/16/2015 11:26:14 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: ‘why don’t
you come back to my place and you can tell me allllllll about it.’

[2/16/2015 11:26:21 PM] Seiya: ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh

[2/16/2015 11:26:27 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: THIS DEFINITELY
HAPPENS AT LEAST ONCE

[2/16/2015 11:26:37 PM] Seiya: DIPPER NEVER LETS HIM FORGET
IT

[2/16/2015 11:26:48 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: after that
Robbie stops using ‘yeah I know Alcor’ as a pickup line

[2/16/2015 11:27:00 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: (he does
not, however, stop drawing totally cool Alcor fanart)

[2/16/2015 11:27:59 PM] Seiya: robbie drawing alcor fanart
is both giving me life and making me super lol

[2/16/2015 11:29:00 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: It’s
totally super lame animu fanart

[2/16/2015 11:29:16 PM] Seiya: dipper for once exersizes
some tact

[2/16/2015 11:29:22 PM] Seiya: and either pretends not to
know

[2/16/2015 11:29:30 PM] Seiya: or if he sees it is like
‘that’s soooo cool!’

[2/16/2015 11:29:49 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: Oh man
that’s really decent of him

[2/16/2015 11:30:34 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: (man dude
I have such a huge soft spot for Robbie and I did kind of from day one but I do
even more now that we know he’s such an absOLUTE DORK)

[2/16/2015 11:30:55 PM] Seiya: OH MY GOD

[2/16/2015 11:30:58 PM] Seiya: HIS PARENTS BEING LIKE

[2/16/2015 11:31:03 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: (mostly
because that was, like, everything that I secretly was on the inside at about
fourteen-fifteen)

[2/16/2015 11:31:05 PM] Seiya: YOU SMELL LIKE DEATH TO
DIPPER AFTER THE TRANSCENDENCE

[2/16/2015 11:31:08 PM] Seiya: also lol yes

[2/16/2015 11:31:14 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary:
FUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK

[2/16/2015 11:31:19 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: HOW DARE

[2/16/2015 11:31:26 PM] Seiya: 😀

[2/16/2015 11:31:27 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: THAT IS
JUST PLAIN MEAN

[2/16/2015 11:31:27 PM] Seiya: lu!

[2/16/2015 11:31:30 PM] Seiya: heuheuheue

[2/16/2015 11:31:34 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: YOU ARE
THE WORST

[2/16/2015 11:31:39 PM] Seiya: lu

[2/16/2015 11:31:50 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: THE
WOOOOOOOOORST

[2/16/2015 11:33:21 PM] Seiya: i win at everything forever

[2/16/2015 11:33:42 PM] Seiya: they tell dipper that after
one of the first time he becomes physical when they move back to GF

[2/16/2015 11:33:50 PM] Seiya: it takes mabel a day to get
dipper out of his shell

[2/16/2015 11:34:04 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: (Honestly
my headcanon is that every time Dipper turns corporeal he’s constructing an
entirely new body out of free-floating atoms, complete with brand-new suit,
hence the line in RRR about getting the stains out, so idk if he would smell of
death? But we can metaphysical-magical handwave it for the sake of
ANNNNNNGGGGGSSSSSSSTTTTTTT)

[2/16/2015 11:34:45 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: BECAUSE
FUCK IF THAT ISN’T A JAGGED KNIFE BETWEEN THE RIBS

[2/16/2015 11:34:46 PM] Seiya: HEUHEUEHUEHUEHE

[2/16/2015 11:34:51 PM] Seiya: maybe robbie’s parents

[2/16/2015 11:34:59 PM] Seiya: have an affinity for that
type of thing?

[2/16/2015 11:35:04 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: SHIT

[2/16/2015 11:35:05 PM] Seiya: that’s what makes them such
good morticians

[2/16/2015 11:35:26 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: Like that
one theory that they were actually very cheerful grim reapers?

[2/16/2015 11:35:51 PM] Seiya: I AM DOWN WITH THAT

[2/16/2015 11:35:57 PM] Seiya: Dipper after the
transcendence looking at them like

[2/16/2015 11:35:59 PM] Seiya: holy shit

[2/16/2015 11:36:27
PM] Seiya: but just

[2/16/2015 11:36:31 PM] Seiya: dipper on one hand

[2/16/2015 11:36:39 PM] Seiya: oe noe he lives forever that
sucks ass

[2/16/2015 11:36:40 PM] Seiya: on the other hand

[2/16/2015 11:36:49 PM] Seiya: part of him reveling in the
fact that he has all the time in the world

[2/16/2015 11:36:54 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: YEAH

[2/16/2015 11:37:00 PM] Seiya: to learn anything and
everything he has ever wanted to know

[2/16/2015 11:37:09 PM] Seiya: to have the secrets of the
universe sometimes fall into his hands

[2/16/2015 11:37:12 PM] Seiya: a part of him loves that

[2/16/2015 11:37:16 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: no need
for sleep, no need to worry about the clock running out, ALL THE SECRETS OF THE
UNIVERSE AT HIS DISPOSAL

[2/16/2015 11:37:19 PM] Seiya: just like another part of him
hates that part

[2/16/2015 11:37:21 PM] Seiya: YEEEEEEEEE

[2/16/2015 11:37:47 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: (honestly
he’s a little disappointed about the whole ‘all the secrets at my disposal’ thing
because…all the discovery is gone)

[2/16/2015 11:37:56 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: (like.
this is all secondhand knowledge.)

[2/16/2015 11:38:32 PM] Seiya: OH NOOOOOOO

[2/16/2015 11:38:35 PM] Seiya: but also oh yes

[2/16/2015 11:38:40 PM] Seiya: mabel fnding dipper one day

[2/16/2015 11:38:46 PM] Seiya: on the verge of tears for
that reason

[2/16/2015 11:39:11 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: (at one
point he realises this is just liek the Journal, upgraded, and maybe he really
IS nothing without it, and he drags Mabel off on a monster hunt and refuses to
use his omniscience to get them out of a sitch he REALLY NEEDS TO USE HIS
OMNISCIENCE FOR and Mabel can’t figure out WHY HE WON’T JUST DO IT AND SAVE
THEM and eventually total breakdown)

[2/16/2015 11:39:38 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: (they save
the heart-to-heart for AFTER they get out of the way of the monster)

[2/16/2015 11:40:01 PM] Seiya: OH MY GOD MARY

[2/16/2015 11:40:03 PM] Seiya: MAH HEART

[2/16/2015 11:40:08 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: 😀

[2/16/2015 11:40:14 PM] Seiya: mabel ends up saving them
both

[2/16/2015 11:40:14 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: TURNABOUT
IS FAIR PLAY

[2/16/2015 11:40:17 PM] Seiya: because obvis

[2/16/2015 11:40:19 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: also yes

[2/16/2015 11:40:35 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: nd Dipper
just. Breaks the fuck down.

[2/16/2015 11:40:41 PM] Seiya: nooooo but yeeeee

[2/16/2015 11:41:07 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: BECAUSE
WHAT GOOD IS IT BEING THE MOST POWERFUL BEING IN THE UNIVERSE IF YOU’RE STILL A
PATHETIC USELESS WEAKLING

[2/16/2015 11:41:22 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: IF YOU
STILL CAN’T PROTECT THE PERSON WHO MATTERS THE MOST

[2/16/2015 11:41:35 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: IF IT
STILL ISN’T *YOU* WHO’S SPECIAL

[2/16/2015 11:42:58 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: (Mabel
smacks him upside the head and drags him home and forces him to play chess with
her without looking at her thoughts/immediate future until he feels slightly
less wretched)

[2/16/2015 11:43:11 PM] Seiya: YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

[2/16/2015 11:44:55
PM] Seiya: gah, mabel calling dipper on his shit k15

[2/16/2015 11:44:58 PM] Seiya: 2k15

[2/16/2015 11:46:32
PM] Seiya: i can see belle or mira doing the same thign

[2/16/2015 11:46:35 PM] Seiya: if i may say so?

[2/16/2015 11:46:53
PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: Yes definitely!

[2/16/2015 11:47:18 PM] Seiya: with belle i can see dipper
being like “oh no i have ruined your lives with this revelation”

[2/16/2015 11:47:19 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: (Mira has
to put up with SO MUCH ANGST from the boys in her life omg)

[2/16/2015 11:47:23 PM] Seiya: blessums

[2/16/2015 11:47:25 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: YEAH

[2/16/2015 11:47:29 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: TOTALLY

[2/16/2015 11:47:33 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: a little
bit

[2/16/2015 11:47:39 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: after they
go back to school

[2/16/2015 11:48:05 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: (my hc is
that Lionel ends up pulling them out of the public school they were at and
putting them into a private school)

[2/16/2015 11:48:19 PM] Seiya: BABS

[2/16/2015 11:48:25 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: (which is
why they’re in the same class as Onika)

[2/16/2015 11:48:40 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: and Lionel
is doing this on a librarian’s salary

[2/16/2015 11:48:44 PM] Seiya: why can i see dipper

[2/16/2015 11:48:48 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: and Dipper
feels twelve kinds of guilty

[2/16/2015 11:48:49 PM] Seiya: somehow helping to make this
happen

[2/16/2015 11:48:57 PM] Seiya: nvm that is better

[2/16/2015 11:49:00 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: so he’s
DEFINITELY HELPING OUT YEAH I WAS JUST ABOUT TO SAY THAT

[2/16/2015 11:49:08 PM] Seiya: HI5

[2/16/2015 11:49:11 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: HI5

[2/16/2015 11:49:38 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: but he’s
also obvs. angsting about how this is all his fault and Belle lost friends and
blah blah blah

[2/16/2015 11:50:05 PM] Seiya: i can see belle being like
“and you’re how old again? don’t you know better by now?”

[2/16/2015 11:50:08 PM] Seiya: in a nice way of course

[2/16/2015 11:50:09 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: so yeah
initially his reaction is better and then he just gets feeling guiltier and
guiltier after they leave GF

[2/16/2015 11:50:14 PM] Seiya: BABS

[2/16/2015 11:50:15 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: EEEEEEEE
yes

[2/16/2015 11:50:32 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: ‘seriously
though how old are you again. I don’t actually know.’

[2/16/2015 11:51:13 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: Mira gets
both more and less angst bullshit because Dipper has more frequent lapses into
demon-think

[2/16/2015 11:51:52 PM] Seiya: OOOOOOOOOOOH

[2/16/2015 11:52:23 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: so every
once in a while she has to deal with the major fallout of a ‘oh god why did I
think that how did I think thinking that was okay WHAT’S HAPPENING TO ME AM I
LOSING IT am I losing myself am I turning into Bill OH MY GOD I AM I’M TURNING
INTO BILL’

[2/16/2015 11:52:50 PM] Seiya: MIRA BABBU

[2/16/2015 11:52:55 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: (which is
why she has like the vaguest idea of who the heck this ‘Bill Cipher’ is in the
first place)

[2/16/2015 11:53:00 PM] Seiya:
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

[2/16/2015 11:53:03 PM] Seiya: MIRA BAB

[2/16/2015 11:53:10 PM] Seiya: mira needs a carton of ice
cream

[2/16/2015 11:53:14 PM] Seiya: or a mani/pedi

[2/16/2015 11:53:48 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: but
usually she just has to smack Dipper on the nose and be like ‘no, you can’t
blow up that child’s mother because you can See where the kid got that bruise
from, we can call the relevant authoritiesl

[2/16/2015 11:54:15 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: ‘no, you
can’t keep dead things in my hou- oh it’s still alive. That’ls…lovely. Thank
you so much. Take it outside.’

[2/16/2015 11:54:43 PM] Seiya: DOES DIPPER LEAVE THINGS ON
HER PILLOW LIKE A KITTY?!

[2/16/2015 11:54:45 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: YES

[2/16/2015 11:54:49 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: HE DOES

[2/16/2015 11:54:51 PM] Seiya: aw ye

[2/16/2015 11:54:54 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: and he
knows she likes cute things

[2/16/2015 11:54:59 PM] Seiya: 😀

[2/16/2015 11:55:00 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: but his
perception of what’s cute

[2/16/2015 11:55:02 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: is

[2/16/2015 11:55:02 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: a

[2/16/2015 11:55:05 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: little

[2/16/2015 11:55:06 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: skewed

[2/16/2015 11:55:14 PM] Seiya: “but mira!

[2/16/2015 11:55:24 PM] Seiya: its a fish with super big
eyes!”

[2/16/2015 11:55:29 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: OH MY GOD

[2/16/2015 11:55:33 PM] Seiya: mira all like “i am two
second from hysterics”

[2/16/2015 11:55:53 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: (giant
squid with those weird totally human-looking eyes draped across her bed
stinking up the whole apartment)

[2/16/2015 11:56:15 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: HUMANS
AREN’T GENERALLY FOND OF COMING HOME TO FIND SEA MONSTERS IN THEIR PLACES OF
RESIDENCE ALCOR

[2/16/2015 11:56:40 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: this is
part of why she’s so into Ian

[2/16/2015 11:56:46 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: his sense
of humour is totally normal in comparison

[2/16/2015 11:57:02 PM] Seiya: OH GOD THAT IS HYSTERICAL IN
CONTEXT

[2/16/2015 11:57:15 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: Mira has
no idea why her friend Sun-mi thinks he’s an actual literal serial killer

[2/16/2015 11:57:34 PM] Seiya: i’m

[2/16/2015 11:57:36 PM] Seiya: i’m piss

[2/16/2015 11:58:05 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: (To be
fair, he was actually trying to impress Sun-mi. That was probably his first
mistake.)

[2/16/2015 11:59:26 PM] Seiya: dipper forgetting how to
people

[2/16/2015 11:59:54 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: (Sun-mi is
definitely a Stanley reincarnation and to be honest, Mira’s boyfriend just
gives her a SUPER WEIRD vibe, she can’t quite put her finger on it. The
off-colour jokes about nuclear radiation were just the cherry on the top of the
sundae.)

[2/16/2015 11:59:58 PM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: YES

[12:00:19 AM] Mary Mary Quite Contrary: Dipper frequently
having to refer back to ‘do humans like x? What did Mizar say?“

Friends With (Tax) Benefits, 1/?

One of the few things we have stuck to on this blog is that “Thou Shalt Not Post AU/AU’s”.

And then one day, Mod S asked Mod Z “but what if Mabel died while having the kids and Dipper and Henry got friend married?”

And then Mod S started writing things and then OH SHIT THIS IS A THING NOW HELP.

And then Mod S went to Mod Z and went “um….can we post this?”

And then Mod Z went “eh, maybe we’ll start posting au/au’s, as long as they kind of go along with the general rules of this universe?”

TLDR: Here is the thing we’ve been working on forever and we may be posting a few more au/au’s in the future

————————-

Multiple universes, a new one branching off for every decision made.

Universes so much in number that not even a top hatted dream demon could keep up with every one of them.

(Dipper tried once when he was 22 and a bit bored and the resulting week long headache that had resulted was decidedly Not Worth It)

Here is one universe, where a certain deal between Henry and Stan and Dipper was never made (why? perhaps Dipper missed a detail, perhaps none of them stopped to think about what being pregnant with triplets would mean, perhaps there was no warning signs….there is no knowing now)l.

End result being, here is Dipper Pines, 27 years old, and watching his sister give birth to her triplets.

There was blood in the OR.

Far, far too much blood.

And Dipper had to choose, make the impossible decision.

Did he save his sister, or her newborn daughter?

(“Dipper Pines, if you love me, don’t worry about me. Save my girl. Please.”

He could never say no to Mabel. Even if it meant losing her.

There was a lot more that was shared between the two of them in the Mindscape before he returned them both to the hospital, felt Mabel leave even as he focused on saving Willow, but what the last conversation between the twins was shall remain strictly between the two of them.)

————

Henry Pines never expected to be a widow by 27.

A widowed father of three newborns at that.

Henry knew, as they lowered the box with Mabel’s ashes into the ground, placed the seed that would grow into a pine tree on top of the small cardboard box, that there would never be another person for him again, no man or woman who could take Mabel’s place in his heart.

Dipper, holding Hank and Willow, hugged Henry with his wings, as together they began to sob.

—————

Two years of marriage, and seven daiquiris in, and Mabel looking at Henry cockeyed and plaster faced on the front porch of the Shack.

“Henry….Henry baby.”

Henry tried to focus on his wife but she was really blurry. ”…Yes Mabel?“

"I need you to promise me something. Something…somethin really big okay?”

“Anything, sweetheart,” Henry managed to get out.

"If I die, I want you to marry Dipper.”

“Of cou- MABEL WHAT-”

She giggled and boffed him on the shoulder.

“You don’t have to do the frickle frackle, just get friend married, yannow?”

Henry wanted the ground to open up and swallow him whole and the only way that this could be worse was if Dipper showed up.

Dipper showed up, corporeal from a summon, and Mabel yanked him onto the porch chair with them.

“Was someone talking about me?” Dipper asked.

“Yeaaaaaaahhhh, Dipdops, I need you to marry my husband when I die okay?”

“Cool, okay, I can do that.”

Henry was blushing bright day glow red now, and studiously not looking at either his wife or his brother in law.

Dipper saw that Henry was trying to ignore him and refused to be ignored.

“I could get you a ring-would you like gold or silver? I mean, it doesn’t matter because I’ve already Marked you any way-”

“You did what?” Henry couldn’t help but squeak out as Dipper and Mabel began to laugh.

(it was on his cheek, though Henry couldn’t see it, the first place Dipper had ever drunkenly kissed Henry, because he loved Henry and Henry was his, though Mabel of course had first dibs on him)

Five years later, Henry was on that same porch swing, wearing a black shirt and blue jeans, stone sober and rocking a sleeping Willow in his arms. Dipper joined him a minute later, having just managed to put Hank and Acacia down for their naps.

They swung in amicable silence for a minute, and then with his free hand Henry reached into his pocket and grabbed out a simple silver band, with a tiny diamond set into it.

“Dipper, Stan and I could use the tax benefits. Will you marry me?”

Dipper was gobsmacked, but went along with the deceptively light tone that Henry was using.

“We don’t have to do the frickle frackle right?”

Henry smiled, albeit a little sadly.

“No, of course not.”

(unsaid in that was despite the best, if not slightly insensitive, recent efforts of some acquaintances of theirs, Henry had decided long ago that there would be no other man or woman for him again. No one would ever be able to fill Mabel’s place in his heart, and he didn’t want that place filled anyway.)

Dipper went on. “I have to say though, if I were ever attracted to anyone in that way, you would be on top of my Bone List.”

Henry, who had been taking a drink of water, proceeded to spit it out across the porch in laughter.

“Thanks Dip.”

Dipper had taken the ring from Henry and was holding it in his fingers, savoring the years upon years of memories within the ring, the emotions and-

“It was Hawk Corduroy’s ring-my grandfather. If we are going to do this, I want to do this right.”

Dipper said nothing for another moment, and kept rolling the ring between his fingers.

Finally, he asked, “Why?”

Henry began to stroke Willow’s hair, baby fine but already down to her back.

“First, I wasn’t kidding about the tax benefits, especially since I’m down to part time at the library for now. And secondly…”

He reached over, grabbed Dipper’s hand with his free one.

“We are raising these kids together, you are my brother and my friend and my partner and….and I remember what Mabel asked us that one time, and maybe I’m just being silly, but I think she’d want us to do this and-”

“Yes.”

“Really?”

“Yes really Henry.”

A pause.

“Um, we aren’t going to make a super big deal out of this are we?” Dipper asked. “Because I love you and all, and I’d be proud to be married to you, but, um-”

The look on Dipper’s face made Henry crack up all over again.

“No, we’ll just go down to the justice of the peace this week.”

“Cool.”

(long after the triplet’s great-great grandchildren had returned to the earth they come from, long after Henry was a distant memory in his mind, Alcor still wore the ring on his left hand. Some imagined the ring to have a great, terrible power and tried to take it.

That never ended well)

————

They clung to each other, and were bound.

Bound by loss, sadness that was grey and all encompassing, a bleeding hole in their souls, sadness that was never ending.

Bound by the determination to protect who was theirs, to protect the three small humans that Mabel had died to ensure that they lived, dark and ruthless in its scope to ensure that who was theirs was safe.

Bound by love, brotherly love of each other, love of the children, love even for Stan.

Love that was deep enough to triumph over anything that came in their way.

That wasn’t to say there weren’t rough spots here and there.

(but then again, that was life, with smooth and rough and good and bad patches all tangled and jumbled within one another)

—————

It was a really good thing that Dipper could touch the triplets like he could Mabel because otherwise this whole thing would have been impossible to pull off, practically speaking.

(the first time he held the babies in his arms, Dipper had spent long minutes just looking at them, golden tears rolling off his face and splashing on to their onesies, unable to believe that he could touch his kids, feel their heartbeats and the blood rushing under their skin)

Dipper could pop onto the physical plane under his own steam, but it was hard, hard to determine how long he had before he utterly exhausted himself and had to phase back on the mindscape. And yes there were sacrifices of candy and food and beer (and Henry was a damn fine cook) but it did nothing to block out the constant background hum of summons in his head.

It took a lot out of Dipper to ignore the constant requests for his presence, the opportunity to tempt and punish and play with the ignorant (no, no, no that was Bill talk), the taste of blood that came on the wind and landed on his tongue (if it tasted like human blood, Dipper went and took care of that immediately because there were some things that needed to be taken care of, kids or no kids, as soon as possible).

Dipper held his niblings as much as possible, cuddling with Hank on the couch, wrapping Acacia to his chest with his wings and some impossible physics, hours spent rocking Willow in the rocking chair in their nursery. Being near his kids, focusing on their presence, helped Dipper to ignore the unceasing beckoning. And honestly, if he could fight off a demon of unimaginable power and might for the sole possession of his body, best him in a battle of will, then Dipper really should be able to handle this.

But.

But Dipper wasn’t just Dipper any more, or just an uncle, just a nephew, just a brother, just a husband.

He was a demon.

A demon that eventually couldn’t ignore that pull on his soul and the scream of his instincts and went out to answer a summons.

A demon who couldn’t help but think that the world would be better off without not only the leader of the cult who had almost sacrificed a child in front of him, but her hanger-ons as well.

A demon who ripped and tore souls from the flesh, because that meant more power which meant more time on this plane, which meant more time with the triplets.

(Dipper would do anything for his children. Anything. And if that meant he was damned, well, he had been damned since he was twelve.)

——

“Da!”

Acacia waved her chubby arms up at Henry from the floor, as he laughed and tried not to cry because Mabel should be here to see this, hear this too.

Acacia looked over at Dipper, and looked at him quizzically for a second.

“Can you say “Uncle”?” Dipper asked.

“I don’t know if she’s there yet Dip,” Henry said, patting Dipper on the shoulder.

“Hey, you never kno-”

“Dunk!”

Dipper grinned, his smile like a shark’s.

“It’s a start.”

(The kids ended up calling Dipper “Dunkle” most of the time, and Dadu , Dadcor, Deedu,and other nicknames the other half the time. Dipper was worried that it was like betraying Mabel,  but Henry told him to stop being a goof.)

——

When the triplets were two, and still walking like tiny drunks everywhere, a short man with a large white blond pompadour broke into the nursery and took them while Henry was at work and Dipper was stuck listening to a man drone on about why Alcor should totally help him take over the world.

(they were all he had left of his marshmallow, his Mabel and there was no way Gideon would let the Pines family ruin them. The children were rightfully his; they should have been his and Mabel’s, rather than Mabel and that mistake, but it wasn’t too late to fix things. Like that last name for starters-Gleeful always had a better ring to it than Pines)

Stuck, that is, until Dipper felt waves of fear and unhappiness ripple through his heart, the three links on his being panging like piano strings being struck and oh my god-

Dipper felt ice go down his spine. He couldn’t lose them, couldn’t lose his children like he lost Mabel, he could̡n̳͇̮̗͇̪’̡̳t̸̲,͠ ̻͉̥̲͍he̵͙̜ ҉̗̭c̪̪o̲͉u͙̠̪̩̣̱̕l҉͖̲̻̭̣d͇̮̲͓ṇ’̧t̮-͕̲̣̘̙

Absently, Alcor tasted the fear rolling in waves off of the pitiable thing in front of him, noticed distantly that he had gone sable black and yellow lines. Alcor reached out a hand, pushed a hand through flesh and bone, and took the man’s soul, eating it in one gulp rather than savoring the taste or making it last like he usually would. Alcor needed it more than him right now.

(Henry found out his children had been kidnapped when he got a call from Stan while he was at work. Henry didn’t remember the next hour, but Mr. Hagesawa later told him that he broke the phone from squeezing it so hard and at some point he had managed to drive himself back to the Shack)

Gideon had made it as far as the forest around the Mystery Shack before he met his doom.

In the minutes up to then, he was struggling to wrangle three tiny redheads who seemed to have turned into little wiggle bots. Wiggle bots that also would have been shattering his eardrums if it weren’t for the spell he had slapped over their mouths to mute them. Gideon kept reminding himself that this was worth it, and once he had gotten out of town, they would settle down and then he could teach his kids some manners, lord only knew what the Pines had done to his children-

“Y̛o̢ur̡ chil͘dr̸en?̛ ͜I ͢d͡on’͔̹͕͕t ̥̠͍̯͎t҉̟̭̹ͅh͖̻͔̤i̻͕͈̬͘n̼͓̬͎͚͜k͞ͅ ͎̠͈̤͚̀s͍͔͓̬̙o͙̱̠̝.̪̟̯͕"̢̭͙͇͎̖͚ͅ

There was a man. Or at least, it was shaped like a man.

Men usually didn’t have large wings erupting from their back.

Or pits of yellow light where their eyes should have been.

And humans weren’t usually wreathed in blue fire, the ground quaking slightly where they tread.

If Gideon were a smarter man, he would have comprehended how completely fucked he was.

But he wasn’t so he took some salt that he had in a pouch from his belt and flung it at the demon.

In response, the demon grew even larger, opened a jaw that unhinged like a snake and had teeth like a shark, and roared.

Mabel’s children, rather than shrieking in terror or crying even more hysterically than they had been, instead started…

Gideon couldn’t believe it. They had started to giggle.

The little boy (Hank, Gideon remembered, though he hadn’t been too fussed and bothered about their names because he had been planning on changing them as soon as they made it to Alaska) cried “Da! Da!”

Alcor reached out and easily plucked his children (his, his, no one else’s, and how dare this worm in front of him even think to touch Alcor’s children-) from the interloper’s grasp. In his arms, his stars blazed bright and happy once more. Polaris bwapped his front with a little fist, and Antares sneezed once or twice before falling asleep.

Gently, oh so gently, Dipper brushed against the minds of his niblings, sending Acacia and Hank to sleep as well, ensuring that they would only dream of happy things before blipping them back to the Shack with a thought.

(And Henry, who hadn’t been able to summon Dipper, and had been pacing the Shack with Stan, both of them almost vibrating from the need to do something, almost collapsed in belief to feel reality waver for a second, and then have his arms full of his children)

Alcor turned back to where the worm had been standing with his stars, but the little mortal had already run.

It was no matter. Alcor could smell his fear, hear his heart beat, feel where the little man’s feet trod upon the ground. It was nothing for Alcor to rip a hole in reality (reality! what a funny, stupid concept really) and emerge where the man was.

Gideon tried to turn to run but found his path blocked at every turn by blue fire, burning almost white in its intensity and circling around Gideon and the demon.

Now the demon was in his almost human guise, looking remarkably like a grown up Dipper Pines, had Dipper not disappeared when his perfect peach had been twelve and the world had turned upside down.

“Did you honestly think,” the demon asked him, “that you would get away with it? That you could take my̬ ̳̲̞̪̰͠c̹͉̥͉̯h̳̗̫̩̮̦̝͡il͙̟̲̪̤d̙̳͈͚͜r̺͔͍̞̙͙e͖̙͉̞͟n̨̫̦̹̣̤̠ ̘̻̼͙̖ͅf̸̘͖̫̮͚̠r͈̜̭̤̮̳̙ơ͕̫̜͉͔̳m͉̫̙̟̠̟ ̤̰̭m̭͓̥͖̖e̥?”

Even though a little part of Gideon was smart enough to know not to engage with the hellspawn in front of him, the larger part of him couldn’t help but snarl “YOUR children? If my Mabel was still alive, she would rather die than let a demon touc-”

Suddenly Gideon couldn’t breathe and his feet gave out from under him, leaving him face first on the ground, crippled by the waves of fear he felt emanating from the demon in front of him. He could see shiny patent leather shoes slowly come near him, the demon kneel next to him, a gloved finger place itself under Gideon’s chin and force his gaze up to the demon’s.

“If my sister was still alive,” the demon told Gideon, “she still wouldn’t love you.”

A razor sharp claw shot through the fabric of the tip of the glove, drawing a slight bit of blood from Gideon’s throat. The dem-no. No, this was Dipper, Dipper Pines though Gideon had no idea how on earth that happened, how this abomination could be.

Dipper licked Gideon’s blood from his finger.

“And if Mabel were still alive, she would do a lot worse to you than what I’m about to do for touching the kids.”

Suddenly, Dipper’s form erupted in front of him into something incomprehensible to human eyes or minds and Gideon began to scream.

“S̼͔͍̣̙h̝͞a̭͚̻̱l̨̟̘̲̘͈͔̗l̠̝̗͍̰̹ ̻̗̟̼͎̜̟w̟͇͜ȩ̙ ̪͓͉̟b̶̹̗̹̺̮e̗̜̹̫̰̥̖g̫̹̭̤͉͚̖͝in̩͢ͅ ̪͚̙̞͖̗͈Gi̛̟̣͕̟̤͕̞d̬̗̭̕e̸͙̪on̹?͘”

There was a part of the forest that forever after no living thing set foot in; even the bugs stayed away. There time had stretched, impossible, a second lasting a decade, an hour a century. There a man was taken almost to the point of death, healed, and then taken back to the point of death over and over and over again.

(how many times? it was hard to tell. how long does the anger of a demon last?)

There was a corner of the vast consciousness of Alcor the Dreambender that held imprisoned within it a soul, a soul that was forever screaming, begging for release, even devourment being preferable to the grey hell the soul found itself in now

(did the demon eat the soul? perhaps eventually? but even when the details began to fade from Dipper’s mind, still Alcor knew that the soul he kept pent within him needed to suffer, that there was a reason why he hadn’t eaten that morsel yet)

Henry woke up from the cat nap he had been taking on their bed, all three kids around him and Mabel’s bat ready at hand, to find that his husband had returned. He was covered in blood, blood all over his front, on his hands and face, on his teeth. In Dipper’s arms, he held the triplets tightly, unable or unwilling to let them go, staring blankly into the distance.

Dipper registered that Henry was awake, and proceeded to tell him what he did to Gideon.

Dipper managed to get out three sentences before Henry ran to the bathroom and threw up everything he had eaten in the last two days.

(but even though Henry had nightmares that night, was haunted for the rest of his life by the knowledge of what Dipper had done, still that night he dragged Dipper into bed with him and the kids when it seemed like his husband was going to be a stubborn doofus and run away.

Dipper was his partner, his children’s uncle and father, and he had saved their kids. Henry could never, ever turn Dipper away.)

They never told the triplets about this however.

——

Henry didn’t know what he would have done without his cousin and the girls. Wendy, Candy, Grenda…they all came through for him and Dipper.

They could never take Mabel’s place (and they were not trying to of course) but all three of them were just so wonderful.

Candy babysat the kids when Dipper was out and Henry had to work, and taught them how to knife fight (sure there was the time that Henry almost had a heart attack because he didn’t know that Candy was going to show them how to knife fight and he came home to his three darling children trying and failing to stab Dipper with wooden knives, but now it was just funny).

The triplet’s first job was at Grenda’s pet shop, and Grenda taught them invaluable lessons about responsibility, the value of hard work, and when to duck because the dragon was about to flame and don’t look the teacup griffin in the eye seriously don’t.

And then there was Wendy.

Wendy who took the girls out to buy their first bras, helped take them prom dress shopping, who told Willow that it was okay if she didn’t want to be with anyone, who gave Acacia dating pointers.

Wendy who practically lived at the Shack the amount of time she spent watching the triplets growing up.

Wendy who taught them how to climb trees (and take them down).

Wendy who also totally won the ‘coolest aunt/uncle’ contest hands down.

Henry had Dipper and Stan, but he was beyond lucky, honored and touched, to have Candy, Grenda, and Wendy in his family’s life as well.

————-

Dipper knew the second that it happened when Mabel reincarnated, felt her soul come back onto this plane..

(because that was his sister, his twin…and, um, that whole owning her soul thing which had never stopped being really painfully awkward for him, and was even more so now that he realized it went past death as well, would stretch over lifetimes.)

But at the same time Mabel reincarnated, he also had his hands full of a ten month old Hank, who had just puked on his suit, and Willow and Acacia were sobbing, and Stan was yelling in the Library at a book collector on the phone that he had been in a bidding war with, and Henry was trying to heat a bottle and-

well.

Mabel was back. But she wouldn’t be Mabel, the Mabel he knew, his sister. She was a new person now, in a new family, a new life.

And in the meantime, he had with him the three little people she had brought into this world, the husband that she had trusted him with, the Shack to watch over.

It killed Dipper to not run immediately to Mabel’s side, to watch over her as she grew, to see who she was (or he, or they-the soul was genderless after all), what he would have in common with his sister and what would be new.

But Mabel wasn’t his only family any more. Now he had Henry, and Acacia and Hank and Willow (and Stan, how could he forget Stan?).

(one of the last things she had asked him was “Take care of them Dipper. Please, please, take care of Henry and-” Even in the Mindscape she had started to cry a bit, scared even though she was trying to put up a jolly front for Dipper. “-and the kids. Please.”)

Dipper could never refuse his sister, even before she literally gave him her dying wish. And he loved his family.

So as hard as it was, (and Dipper would be lying if he said not a day went by without him thinking about popping in to see the new person his sister was now), Dipper tried his best to put Mabel out of his mind, to focus on his niblings and husband and grunkle.

The fact that seven years later his sister ended up waltzing into town anyway boggled his mind.

HC: When frustrated or upset with Mable, Dipper will sometimes accidentally slip into his demon voiceand Mables response is always “DIPPER PINES, DON’T YOU DARE TAKE THAT TONE OF VOICE WITH ME YOUNG MAN”

There are a small handful of people whom Dipper is comfortable enough with to use ~classic demonic scare tactics~ on purpose, and without remorse

generally because it doesn’t do squat to them

years into Henry and Mabel’s marriage, Dipper is known to sometimes slip into full demon mode after getting caught doing something he shouldn’t have (“Damn it Dipper those cookies were for the kids’ bake sale!”), and Henry no longer bats an eyelash as he grabs a broom to chase his brother-in-law with. The whole flaming claws and fangs and inhuman hissing just earns Dipper a good whack on the face; not that there wasn’t a time where such a display would make Henry piss himself and pass out

Wendy, Grenda, Candy, Stan, and a few others here and there just don’t take the threat seriously, because they know it isn’t (not when it’s in response to something so mundane, anyway)

Stan tends to be unapologetic about using a squirt bottle of holy water on his nephew like he’s a disobedient cat, and Candy’s tolerance for his shit is paper-thin (not a good combo when she’s always got blessed or enchanted weapons at the ready to hurl at him), so he doesn’t do it to them quite so often…

(Mabel’s best weapon in retaliation to her brother’s shenanigans is simply her “I’m so fucking done” expression; Dipper has been known to deflate and mutter an apology without her saying even a word when she means business)